Sunday, October 4, 2009

Books


I am the worst person when it comes to finishing a book. Here's a list of all the books (that I can remember) I have started or am in the middle of:

And Then There Were None, by Agatha Christie
The Silmarillion, by J.R.R. Tolkien
The Conqueror Worms, by Brian Keene
The 120 Days of Sodom, by the Marquis de Sade
Dark Mountain, by Richard Laymon
Blood Games, by Richard Laymon
Beware, by Richard Laymon
Cuts, by Richard Laymon
Camp, by Alan Saperstein
It, by Stephen King
Rose Madder, by Stephen King
Cujo, by Stephen King
Needful Things, by Stephen King
Rage, by Stephen King (as Richard Bachman)
If Chins Could Kill, by Bruce Campbell
The Ruins, by Scott Smith
Redwall, by Brian Jacques
The Divine Comedy, by Dante
Superstitious, by R.L. Stein
Sasquatch: Legend Meets Science, by Jeff Meldrum
The Wolfman and other cases, by Sigmund Freud
Make Your Own Damn Movie, by Lloyd Kaufman

I did not include the countless books I had to read for school that I managed to not complete. Some of those include:

1984, by George Orwell
Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley
The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath
The Centaur, by John Updike
The Lord of the Flies, by William Golding
The Heart of Darkness, by Joseph Conrad
The Epic of Gilgamesh, author unknown
The Golden Ass, by Lucius Apuleius

Strangely, the books I do finish I end up loving. This makes me wonder why I get lazy and don't finish most of the books I start. Maybe it's the fact that I finished a book that makes me love it. Who knows.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Killing Birds - My favorite movie

Because I don't have very much to say at the moment, here's a review of my favorite film, Killing Birds, I posted on imdb.com recently (with a few minor changes):

Back in the 70's, Fredrick Brown comes home from the Vietnam war only to find his unfaithful wife in bed with another man. Brown kills the man and his in-laws, who have the worst timing in the world, and finally offs his wife, but spares his infant son. He then slays all the residents of his aviary and gets blinded by a pair of talons in the process. Before going into the hospital, he gives his baby son away. Flash forward 20 or so years, and we arrive at a Louisiana university where Steve and his group of friends have been awarded a grant to document the extremely endangered ivory-billed woodpecker before it is considered extinct for their senior project. Also along for the ride are Anne, his former girlfriend and school journalist, and Brian, the driver. They drive into the swamp, first to interview Brown, who is now apparently a doctor of ornithology, and then to search for the bird. But when they hold up in an abandoned house, zombies attack.

Let me give you a summation of what every reviewer who ever saw this film has said on either IMDb, amazon.com, or other review sites: too boring, too slow, not enough zombies, idiotic characters, doesn't explain anything, Robert Vaughn's talent is wasted, not scary, stupid, I can't believe Joe D'Amato produced this, worst zombie movie ever, etc, etc, etc. It's a massive challenge to find one person online who really likes this film (if you look at the aforementioned sites, you're bound to run into my positive reviews). Apparently, these folks are extremely discriminating when it comes to horror films, or they are so offended that it doesn't follow every zombie movie convention down to the finest detail and are consequently unimpressed. I say these folks can just watch Dawn of the Dead a few dozen more times if they can't handle anything different.

Here's my side of the story: Killing Birds is a completely enjoyable film for those who know what to expect. The characters are the biggest dorks ever, unintentionally of course. Carlo Maria Cordio's score is pretty awesome and atmospheric (and pretty happy too during the campus/montage scenes, unfortunately these happy tunes do not show up on the soundtrack CD). The death scenes can be pretty gruesome, but all the gore takes place above the shoulders. Sure it takes a while for the zombies to show up, however unless you are a huge zombie nut, it's not that big of a deal. Until this main course, all the cheese provided by the cast should hold your appetite. The lighting, for the most part, fits well with the overall mood the filmmakers were trying to achieve, and the direction is nothing special, but not bad.

I for one think that Killing Birds offers us a unique blend of horror genres. It combines elements from ghost, slasher, and zombie flicks. Let me explain: The abandoned house our heroes (or zeroes) take refuge in is haunted, due to some curse Dr. Brown had something to do with when he murdered his family. Instead of ghosts haunting this house, there are zombies, who come out of the mist, out of the walls, out of the ceiling, you name it. Instead of these zombies eating the brains out of our troupe of losers, they just slaughter them, much like Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers. And these zombies cannot be stopped by a mere bullet to the head, not that Steve and company ever tried. So, you see, Killing Birds is a horror mash-up of sorts. It even has a nature-strikes-back theme during the conclusion.

If any of this sounds appealing to you, I'm sorry. Chances are, you belong to the large majority of people who will not appreciate a film like this. That's okay, more for me. I think the reason why I love this movie so much is that it fits my personality, so giving an unbiased review is impossible on my part. Let me just warn you that this film is not for fans of zombies, Joe D'Amato, Robert Vaughn, Italian horror, or Hitchcock's The Birds. For what it's worth, a good companion film is Witchery (aka Ghosthouse 2), featuring returning talents of D'Amato, Cumming, and Cordio and those of David Hasselhoff (Baywatch) and Linda Blair (The Exorcist)."

And that's about it. Needless to say I've become quite an expert on this motion picture. I'm gonna try to find the shirt the character Steve wore in the movie which reads LSU RAPTOR REHABILITATION UNIT. That's when I'll be real stylin'.

If nothing exciting happens in my life during the next few days, expect more reviews. They kill a lot of time when written well and are pretty fun if you're nerdy like me.